Sunshine Sucks

So this morning I am happily sleeping when this wideo called the sun marches into my bedroom uninvited and shines it big yellow ass in my face. What a tool. Eventually have to get a jumper and stuff it up the vent, get a pillow and wedge it in the porthole, flip that yellow arsehole the V's and head back to slumber land. Once the war with the ducks winds itself up in a bloody conclusion of feathers and sad quacking noises, he's next. Shouldn't be too hard, he uses the same route to and from work everyday so an ambush will be easy to organise.

Certain sources point towards the sun as being an ecological terrorist, casting down his rays to create drought, famine, shadows, I would be doing the world a favor. The same sources (standard grade geography text book with the picture of cow on front) lead me to believe that wind is one of his henchmen, under his influence. If that is the case then war is inevitable as they have already called first blood. Innocently scrubbing down in the shower, get to the feet, lift one leg up to get between the toes, big gust from wind and I am nearly on my ass. Uncalled for, the thought I might have to install one of those big granny red buttons incase I do fall over was worse than the slip itself.

Their time will come

Signing off

DougalDutch